For years, I thrived in the fast-paced world of tech. My days were filled with product launches, deadlines, endless Slack messages, and the kind of constant pressure that leaves you both exhilarated and exhausted. On paper, I had everything I thought I wanted: a well-paying job, stability, and a clear career path. But beneath the surface, I was burning out. The pandemic years had already blurred the line between work and life, and I realized I was living on autopilot. That’s when I decided to do something radically different: I left my job and moved to Spain.
Taking the Leap Into the Unknown
Deciding to leave wasn’t easy. I worried about money, career progression, and what others would think. Friends in the industry couldn’t understand why I would walk away from what they considered a dream role. But I knew I needed to prioritize something other than constant growth and productivity. Moving to Spain was partly practical—I had always loved its culture, language, and slower pace of life—and partly symbolic. It was my way of reclaiming control over my own story.
The Shock of Being Alone Abroad
What I didn’t anticipate was just how hard it would be to start over in a foreign country. The first few months in Madrid were lonely. I struggled with the language despite years of studying Spanish in school. Small tasks like setting up a bank account, registering for utilities, or even ordering at the neighborhood café felt overwhelming. Without the familiar rhythm of coworkers, daily meetings, or office banter, I was left alone with myself—a daunting prospect.
There were days I questioned everything. Did I make a huge mistake? Was I sabotaging my career? Was this just an expensive escape from reality? Those were the nights when loneliness felt suffocating, and I craved the sense of belonging I had taken for granted back home.
Learning to Embrace Discomfort
Yet, it was exactly in those moments of discomfort that growth began. Living alone in a foreign country forced me to confront my own fears and insecurities. I learned patience when paperwork dragged on for months. I learned resilience when I got lost in unfamiliar streets and had to figure it out without anyone’s help. Slowly, the chaos became less intimidating. I began to take pride in small victories—navigating conversations entirely in Spanish, cooking traditional dishes at home, or striking up friendships with locals.
Discovering a New Pace of Life
One of the most profound shifts was experiencing the Spanish lifestyle. In tech, I was used to back-to-back calls, late-night emails, and the constant sense of urgency. Spain introduced me to something different: long lunches that stretched into conversations, evening walks through lively plazas, and a culture that valued connection over efficiency. Shops closed in the afternoon not because of inefficiency, but because people prioritized balance. It was frustrating at first, but eventually, I realized it was exactly what I needed.
Redefining Success
Moving abroad forced me to redefine what success meant. For so long, success was tied to promotions, raises, and recognition. In Spain, success became about learning how to build a life from scratch. It was about the courage to show up to language exchanges even when I stumbled through sentences, or the humility to ask strangers for help. It was about creating a version of myself that wasn’t solely defined by my job title.
Building a New Community
Loneliness didn’t disappear overnight, but it softened as I built connections. I joined a local hiking group, attended language meetups, and started volunteering at a community center. These experiences introduced me to people from all walks of life—other expats seeking belonging, Spaniards who welcomed me with patience, and friends who quickly became like family. The very thing that scared me most, being alone, became the foundation for building deeper, more intentional relationships.
How It Changed Me for the Better
Looking back, leaving tech and moving to Spain was one of the hardest but most transformative decisions I’ve ever made. It taught me that growth doesn’t always happen in conference rooms or during product launches—it happens in the quiet, uncertain spaces where you’re forced to rely on yourself. It showed me that resilience isn’t just about surviving stress, but about thriving when you step outside your comfort zone. Most importantly, it reminded me that life is more than work—it’s about connection, presence, and creating a story that feels authentic.
Not everyone needs to quit their job and move across the world to grow. But for me, Spain became the mirror I needed to see who I really was outside of a career. Being alone in a foreign country was hard, sometimes painfully so, but it stripped away all the noise and left me with clarity. Today, I am not the same person who once measured success in promotions and paychecks. I’m someone who measures it in courage, resilience, and the joy of living a life I chose for myself.
